R U Being served!!!!!

A young man named Gordon bought a donkey from an old farmer for £100.00.The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day, but when the farmer drove up he said, "Sorry son, but I have some bad news... the donkey is on my truck, but unfortunately he's dead. Gordon replied, "Well then, just give me my money back."The farmer said, "I can't do that, because I've spent it already. Gordon said, "OK then, well just unload the donkey anyway. The farmer asked, "What are you going to do with him?" Gordon answered, "I'm going to raffle him off."To which the farmer exclaimed, "Surely you can't raffle off a dead donkey!"But Gordon, with a wicked smile on his face said, "Of course I can, you watch me. I just won't bother to tell anybody that he's dead." A month later the farmer met up with Gordon and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?"Gordon said, "I raffled him off, sold 500 tickets at two pounds a piece, and made a huge, fat profit!!"Totally amazed, the farmer asked, "Didn't anyone complain that you had stolen their money because you lied about the donkey being dead?"To which Gordon replied, "The only guy who found out about the donkey being dead was the raffle winner when he came to claim his prize.So I gave him his £2 raffle ticket money back plus an extra £200, which as you know is double the going rate for a donkey, so he thought I was great guy!!Gordon grew up and eventually became the Chancellor of the Exchequer, and no matter how many times he lied, or how much money he stole from the British voters, as long as he gave them back some of the stolen money, most of them, unfortunately, still thought he was a great guy.The moral of this story is that, if you think Gordon is about to play fair and do something for the everyday people of the country for once in his miserable, lying life, think again my friend, because you'll be better off flogging a dead donkey.

Weekend Rugby

Let's start with the most contraversial match of the weekend, which must be Italy v Wales. Italy beat Wales ..... Hardly a surprise as Wales have not been on form throughout this tournament. But of course it's someone elses fault. This time it's Chris White the Referee who when asked how much time was left told the Wales team 10 Seconds ..... Then he was asked if they could kick to touch ..... Yes was the answer ...... Now forgive my niavety here but with only 10 seconds to go ...exactly what did the welsh think they were going to achieve ...... thay hadn't really been able to out muscle the Italians throughout the match so the lineout option was the wrong choice. Anyway after a quick discussion the ball was kicked to touch. The time keeper (Who is now in charge of time at these games) then informed CW that time was up ..... Now CW could have overuled him but why should he ... .seems bloody obvious to me that with only 10 seconds left you either run it or take the 3 points ....providing you can get it between the uprights of course. So the pic is for the Welsh team this week ..... who as I predicted earlier are well on their way to the Wooden Spoon.

OK Scotland V Ireland ....... Not really much to say about this one ...... Ireland won (as expected) but not without a rather close scare from the Scots.

Now England V France ....... England haven't beaten France since the Semi final of the world cup and were not expected to win, considering France recent form (Played 3 won 3) including beating the Irish at Croke Park. Add to that the 11 changes to the England team well everything seemed set for a French win ......

Holiday

Well we've booked our short break for this year with John and Wendy. This time we are going to try Rockley Park. This has got to be better than where we went last year ..... A place I couldn't even be bothered to write about as not only was the Entertainment crap ...... the kids had nothing to do ..... and we weren't even allowed to entertain ourselves without someone complaining to security that we were too loud. We had to go and buy our own darts .... the pool table never had any chalk .... and for what was supposed to be a "Lively" camp ...it was closer to Gods waiting room.

So our annual piss up this year will be spent down in poole ......

Tracey and I are also planning a short break away in August up to Scotland to visit an old friend of Tracey's, Len of fasteddies. So that will be 3 nights in Scotland. Hopefully we will find a nice Castle to stay in while we're up there. You never know maybe I can get a Job up there coaching their Rugby team ...... You see even though the English are crap at the moment ....we still know how to beat the Italians.

Crowded House

No not the band ..... but my house at the moment. It's no bodies fault really. Tracey's Mum and Dad are staying with us while he undergoes treatment over here, they actually spend most of the year in Portugal, the weather there being better for them both. Anyway the upshot is that the house has more people staying in it that can be handled for an extended period of time and everyones nerves are getting frayed.

Laying in bed with Tracey the other night (only get to sleep in the bed lately or watch telly) I said enthusiastically that we only had until 8th March and then we get the house back. She replied that they may be staying longer because of some difficulty with her Dads medication. So I said that it didn't matter ....come the 8th either they were gone or I was. The next hour was the most silent I can remember. Finally I said something to Tracey (can't remember what exactly) and she replied with something like " Well you have just told me your leaving me". Well that wasn't exactly what I meant by the statement as I explained to her, there are certain friends who had offered me a bed if I needed to get away.

So here we are again crowded house ... But at least they get to spend time with their grandchildren. That is of course when the kids haven't found a way to escape. Tracey commented once on how her parents have seen more of the kids than my Mum (who lives in Australia) ... I reminded her that my Mum only got over to England once every 5 years ....and at least she had the decency to book herself into a Hotel when she was here ......

Having her mum over isn't really that bad, at least some of the time Tracey gets the help she needs with all the extras that her father requires ..... certain foods ....eating at different times etc.

It feels difficult really ...... considering all the help they have given us over the years ...... It's hard to get angry about certain ways ..... Like her dad saying that he needs to go on the computer the second you turn it on for yourself ....... especially when he has spent 5 hours on it during the day.

Ok ....better stop ranting now otherwise it's gonna become a novel.